I’ve been struggling with writing this blog post for a few weeks for a few reasons. First, I’m not an expert in fat-acceptance or body-neutrality. Second, I have privilege in this space. I’m white, not unattractive by many current cultural standards, and am able to comfortably wear most clothing brands. (This may sound like bragging; this is acknowledging privilege.) Because I have benefitted from my privilege, however, does not mean that I have not been harmed by the beauty and diet industries.

Many of my friends might be surprised to know that I flirted with an eating disorder during my senior year of high school and although I could blame the teen-girl magazines of the late 90’s and early aughts (RIP Jane), it was the director of our high school musical whose comments triggered my “need” to lose weight. 

I had been cast as Mrs. Mullin in our school’s production of Carousel. The director was also head of the gifted and talented program of our school, of which I was a longstanding member, and I was aware that she’d had problematic interactions with many of my fellow students in the past. She chose a red dress that the head of the costume department, an adult volunteer, had found. 

It ALMOST fit, but the zipper wouldn’t get past my waist, so I turned to the adults and said it was too small and wouldn’t work. The director’s response was along the lines of “This is the costume, so change yourself to make it fit.” I don’t remember how long I had between that try-on and the week of our performances, but that is when I first became conscious of what I was eating. I started drinking coffee and eating a half-sandwich most days for lunch, beginning with only a yogurt for breakfast. My slight shift in eating worked: I succeeded in zipping that red dress all the way with room to spare. I stopped trying to limit my calories when the performances were over and ate only when I was hungry, until I wasn’t anymore. 

I was lucky to escape high school without that experience triggering a much larger issue, but those memories have always remained; I could get skinnier if I worked hard enough or if I was controlling enough…but, before I head down that road of disorder, I’m able to talk myself out of that way of being. My experience pales in comparison to others and knowing this makes me so mad. If someone like me had that experience, and felt pressure from adults in charge–custodians of my mental, educational, and physical well-being–it’s hard to imagine the experience of those who did not and do not have my privileges. I recognized the toxic  standards to which I was being held and although it would have been better to not feel that pressure at all, it made me aware and gave me the fortitude to banish those thoughts and recognize messages I was receiving as unhealthy. The comments from my teacher/director harmed me but they also opened the door for me to recognize just how pervasive, and even accepted, “weight loss” culture is. I’m still consistently working against internalized fat phobia (just like I’m working against internalized white supremacy, ableism, victim-blaming, and capitalism). I will never tell a client they need to lose weight. Using my own personal experience as a jumping off point, there are several science-backed reasons why I don’t promote weight loss.

1. The BMI is rooted in racism and not an accurate way to measure health. The Body Mass Index is a calculation based on height and weight that will supposedly give you a number which quantifies weight but does not take into account factors like frame size or age. Please go read this article for more details on the problems surrounding the BMI.
2. The diet industry is just that: an industry. Companies recognize people’s insecurities, pain, and idealized standards are something to commodify and monetize. Television shows like Extreme Makeover or The Biggest Loser are some of the grossest displays of this. People are much more complex than simple calories in/calories out. I’m much more interested in the quality of food than calories. A Luna Bar has fewer calories than a grass-fed steak but I will always recommend steak as the more nutritionally dense protein option (except in the case of an allergy).
3. The demonization of macronutrients is problematic. In the 1960’s research sponsored by the sugar industry, later debunked, pointed toward fat as the main driver of heart disease. Fast-forward to now, when people who desire quick and extreme weight loss go Keto (extremely low carbohydrate) without guidance and mess with their hormones. Almost all of us need a combination of all three macronutrients to survive and thrive, and ideal percentages will vary person to person. The details of how we determine what works best for an individual also vary between nutritionists. Here are factors I look at to determine a good starting place:
   a) Genetic/ethnic background: traditional foods of your ancestors
   b) Local/seasonal foods near where you live
   c) Time of life: pregnant/breastfeeding; pre- or post- menopausal/andropausal, etc.
   d) Activity levels: desk work or something more physical; do you train for marathons on the weekend or prefer yoga most weekdays?
   e) Illness: recovering from an injury; living with an auto-immune disease or other chronic condition
4. Weight alone is not an indication of poor health and more studies are coming out to prove this. If you go to a doctor for an issue and they say that you first need to lose weight, please find another doctor! Blood pressure, blood glucose, resting heart rate, heart rate variability, inflammation, and vitamin/mineral deficiencies (low Vitamin A, calcium, magnesium, selenium, iodine, Vitamin D) are all things that can be addressed through nutritional adjustments. Sometimes when these other issues are addressed, people may lose weight. 
5. Focusing on losing weight and wanting to be thin does not provide a basis for long-term success. In my opinion, it is too shallow of a goal based on factors that we think will make us happy. Lasting nutritional changes must be motivated by a deeper desire: do you want to be able to keep up with your kids during playtime or have the energy to take your dog on those long walks they love? Most people who diet to lose weight fail and end up gaining more. If you’re trying to plan for yourself, all of the information can be overwhelming and contradictory. Professionals like me are trained to guide you, help you prioritize, and distill the science behind these studies to what is applicable to you.

If you come to me with weight-loss as a goal, I’m not going to turn you away. I will, however, dig deeper to help you reframe your goals. (I am not strictly anti-weight loss, but my job is to help you see your health journey as being about more than weight loss.) Working with a mental health professional is imperative to help you understand your own motivations, triggers, and insecurities and to place them within a larger context. While not a requirement, it is something I ask clients who come to me with weight-loss goals to incorporate into their lives.

Things I do promote: lowering your resting heart rate, getting deep and restorative sleep, tuning into your circadian rhythm, reducing anxiety and depression, increasing energy and focus, stabilizing blood sugar, reducing inflammation, balancing your hormones, reducing chronic and acute pain/discomfort, increasing immunity, and correcting nutritional deficiencies. You may lose weight when these other puzzle pieces fall into place. If you don’t, it’s important to be able to recognize your successes, victories, and value independently of your size.

Additional resources:
Health At Every Size
https://haescommunity.com/

People either love winter or hate it, and it seems that this year the factions seem to have especially strengthened their conviction based on the weather’s ability to prevent safer outdoor social gatherings during the Covid-19 Pandemic.

For those of us in the Northern Hemisphere, we have about six weeks of the coldest season left, and while some of you are probably counting down the days until you can comfortably exist outside for an extended amount of time, I am reveling in my favorite season. As I write this, New York City is being blanketed by a winter storm that may deposit almost two feet of snow, and I am delighted.

I grew up in what is known as the Snow Belt, an area of Northern New York that often breaks records for snowfall amounts and is lucky enough to be dumped on my something called “Lake Effect Snow,” which is the precipitation that occurs when weather systems pick up extra moisture as they move from west to east over the Great Lakes, and then dump it all in that very special region. There’s a ton of people that detest Lake Effect Snow, because it makes travel quite precarious and de-icing your car an unwelcome additional chore, but… I love it. I grew up skiing from the age of four, at a small “hill’ on the edge of the Adirondacks, and while I’m definitely not what one would call “athletic” or particularly outdoorsy, its the only sport I can actually do OKAY at. (Yes, I was on the ski team in high school, but to be fair, there were no try-outs. If you wanted to join, you could. My claim to fame was that I never came in dead last at meets, but I was definitely the slowest member in our group.)

Photo evidence of my ski team participation.

However, my appreciation of skiing isn’t why I love winter. Instead it has more to do with my chronic illness, fibromyalgia. Ambient room temperatures above 71 degrees just create a lot of extra pain and aches, and its a lot easier to keep a room in my preferred range when it’s below freezing outside. In an annoying twist of fate, being too cold ALSO increases my fibromyalgia pain, but it’s easier to layer up with cozy clothes and blankets than it is too cool off with a window AC unit and fans. (Everyone with fibromyalgia or another chronic illness has their own preferences/threshold for temperatures, so please don’t take mine as representative of the entire group.)

Along the same lines, it’s much easier for me to get deep sleep during the colder months. Ideal sleeping temperatures are 60 to 67 degrees Fahrenheit (15.6 to 19.4 degrees Celsius), a LOT lower than I feel comfortable setting my AC in the summer, because…the environment and my energy bill. Getting deep sleep is absolutely one of the biggest challenges those with fibromyalgia face. I use a Fitbit to track my sleep, and have noticed that on nights when I get less than an hour of deep sleep, the next day I am unable to focus, weak, dizzy, nauseous…basically worthless. (I also have something called a chiliPAD that I use in the warmer months to keep my bed a lower temperature without having to blast my air conditioner. Full review upcoming!) One of the best things about winter is definitely my increased quality of sleep.

Lastly, being someone with a chronic illness, I sometimes have to cancel plans when I’m not feeling well. In winter, staying cozy at home is something most people understand, so I don’t feel the social pressure to meet up in the park for a socially distant hang.

(I want to acknowledge the privilege I have as a housed person to enjoy winter as my favorite season. For a lot of people, it’s a much more difficult season that they are just trying to survive. Please educate yourself on this topic and examine your biases against the poor in your own health journey. Public health, the climate/environment, and social justice are inextricably intertwined.)

It’s January, and you’re probably inundated with plenty of ads on social media urging you to “stick to your resolutions!” or “lose weight now with this amazing plan/program/product/insert magic pill here!”. Not surprisingly, January has tended to show a bit of an uptick in inquiries for my private cheffing and nutritional consulting services (in NYC and virtually, respectively), and although I’m always excited to hear from someone who I think would be an ideal client, something I try to really hone in on is the “why” behind it all. Figuring our someone’s motivation is THE KEY to the nutritionist/client relationship. One big motivation lots of people glom onto is because they want to lose weight, which isn’t something that I promote (more on this in an upcoming blog). We need to dig deeper beyond society’s expectations of beauty, which are informed by racism and colonialism, and used by companies to fuel consumerism and constantly whisper “You’re not good enough.”
There are a lot of people who can articulate the problems with diet culture a lot better than myself, and I recommend you give them a follow on instagram (Virginia Sole-Smith, Aubrey Gordon, Jameela Jamil).
So now that we’ve gotten the reason I don’t love to work with a nutritional consultant out of the way, here are my top three reasons to work with me.

1) Your stomach hurts, you’ve got chronic or occasional acid reflux, you are self-conscious about your breath or bathroom habits. All of these symptoms point to problems with your digestion. If these aren’t super severe and you go to your doctor, they will most likely just write you a prescription for an antacid (despite their contribution to kidney disease), tell you to take probiotics, eat more/less fiber, use mouthwash, or take some Lactaid. Your doctor may be more tuned into nutrition and tell you to do an elimination diet to figure out if you have any allergies or intolerances, but at the end of your appointment you’re left with a temporary solution, and no resources to help you get to the root of your problems or how to deal with your intolerances in the future. Thats where I come in. As a nutritional consultant, I do a full intake on your health issues, likes/dislikes, lifestyle, and meet with you on a regular basis so that we can take things step by step and troubleshoot as things come up.

2) You have trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, feeling awake in the morning, or rely on caffeine to make it through the day. Besides timing of meals and recommending specific foods to eat or avoid, a holistic nutritionist can help you reset your circadian rhythm.) Poor sleep habits can lead to memory issues, are associated with gut-bacteria imbalances, and a contribute to a lowered immune system. I can help you create new habits to support your sleep, through both food and lifestyle changes.

3) You experience a mood disorder like anxiety or depression. Studies are finally showing what we have known for a long time; food is information your body reads and nutritional deficiencies contribute significantly to mental health. I am trained to work with your therapist, psychologist, psychiatrist, and/or general practitioner/doctor to make sure we are all on the same page. I will never advocate stopping/changing prescriptions in favor of only dietary changes/supplements without working with a licensed mental health professional or doctor. We all have different areas of expertise and can work together; it’s not an either/or situation.

There you have it! There are a lot more reasons that I’ll cover in future blogs, so stay tuned.